Honey + Lemon = Hsuan

2010-02-23T10:25:00.002+08:00

haha im back to post once again!!

this is a special post to my beloved W319 GoldenYouths!! hahaha... thank you for your enthusiam and inspiration in soccer that had always encouraged me whenever im feeling down... I know most of you didnt know about it, but my body is having alot of problems recently... old injuries coming back once again and i have been scared and worried that whether my one little talent will just disappear like that. having already stopped doing midnight trainings and cut down alot on routine trainings but the pains are still always and there were times that i really cried over me being so helpless with my injuries... but ever since i met you all, played soccer with you all and seeing the enthusiam and inspired you all are when i teach you all soccer, it just encourages me so much that im just not afraid of anything and enjoy soccer with you all. You all will shine very brightly and im very sure you all will be a new light in singapore's stage of soccer... thank you for being my inspiration and let me remember that posibilities is still happening and you all are the possibilities! let us strive with excellence and be the head and not the tail! =)

2010-02-07T23:56:00.002+08:00

Back to post once again... haha... need to revive this blog since it was dead for quite some time... haha!!

went to play soccer with the W319 guys this morning together with my brother! as the guys wanted to play during asia conference's soccer tournament this may, so thought of asking them to come and play so as to see what i could help them with. I have to admit... i seriously think that W319 has alot of soccer players with hidden talents!! for example: alvin with his "hip-hop" skills that never failed to make me laugh and he is good! norman who can do link up with me on our first try, jerry who have quite good marking skills, pitson with is rock hard body used for good defense! timothy and xun xin who have good shooting instincts! etc etc... man... a team with hidden talents and im just so excited to see this batch of "golden youths" shining brightly during the soccer tournament!

but through soccer today, i have understand the importance of teamwork and having joy in what we do! if we dont enjoy doing something that we are doing now, then it become an unfruitful activity! shall train up myself so that im able to teach them with all i have... really thank God for such an inspiring cg! =)

shall update again and see you peeps! =)

2010-01-18T10:16:00.002+08:00

haha... have started to prepare for my vision 3 years later... so i started it out by wearing ankle weights every day... it was kind of heavy at the start.. because i need to work on my body balance and thus wearing ankle weights will work... and when i took it down on saturday night, preparing to go for my soccer training on sunday... i felt so light-footed!! woohoo... and i got that feeling of the speed wizard back... the long lost feeling... but this time round, its not my will but Yours my Lord. =)

sunday was the first show of my results of my special training... and my legs shocked me to the extent of how fast i can go... haha... but i suffered alot of injuries as well... haha!! scraped both knees, cuts on my left thigh, scraped my left ankle, and my left knee and left ankle are swollen... and the worst of all... a splinter pierced into my right shin when i slided on the field during a fall... and i got nauseous and vomited... but thank God the injury wasnt very bad and its recovering faster than i expected too... but i know... great destiny have great prices to pay... i will lay down my life for Your vision even if my body were to shatter... and because its Your will, You will take care of me... and so God, i decided to dream big... i want to travel around the world to be the rainbow of the raining world of the orphans in the world!! i shall not limit my vision!! =)

shall update my blog again.. see you peeps soon! =)

2010-01-10T01:44:00.002+08:00

for the year of 2010... it had been a mixture of good and bad... haha... the bad thing is that the parental objection had been getting stronger till a point that i felt very pressurised when im at home, but thank God for Your stretch in my capacity and i managed to handle it with Your grace till now... and the good thing is that i managed to go to service todae!! YAY!! haha... was so sad when my boss told me that i need to work on sat and sun... and on friday night... i decided to believe, visualise and keep declaring that i will go for svc even through facebook and twitter.. >.<
and in the end God made it possible for me!! and i went for svc todae!! but God did even more for me by giving me a sunday free of work!! Praise the Lord! =)

i have seen changes in my vision... i saw myself wearing a jersey with the no 17 instead of the no 7... and through that picture God was telling me to embrace the no 17 and i was quite reluctant, because no 7 was a no that i alwaes like and it means perfect victory in biblical terms... but after todaes sermon... i had to place God in everything i do... and since this is God's dream, i shall obey what God had shown me in my dream and vision... and i decided to embrace the no 17... and 17 = 1 God giving me the perfect victory(7)!! wow!! not my will but Yours be done!! i will declare this no together with my 3 years of preparation to regaining the talents of the speed wizard and i will bring these to teach the orphans and impact them! giving them a new hope!! =)

shall update soon!! cya peeps! =)

2010-01-05T16:35:00.002+08:00

haha... the 1st week of 2010 didnt start quite well?? haha... took the wrong train line to church on sat for the 1st svc of 2010... instead of going towards joo koon, i went towards pasir ris... haha!! so malu la! and i overslpt for my 1st soccer training of 2010! haha... training is at 11am at redhill, i woke up at 10.45am! hahaaha!! oh man... it started so wrong but its alrite... bcoz i know You are still with me... =)

body had been acting up once again for this week when im starting to train my body back to fitness and training back the soccer skills i once had 10 years back... but its nt for my own will this time... its for You Lord... for You vision tt You gave to me to use this talent n miracle leg of mine to impact the youths with soccer... and thank you Lord for your healing, so that my old injuries arent acting up too badly... it was alot better than last year... thank you God! =)

new year, new changes, new grace, and also a new me! i have decided to have a habit of reading, because since young i disliked reading... talk about reading, its just equal to me sleeping with the book on my hand or even my pillow... haha... but ever since i was saved by You, i have started to have a habit to read the bible everyday at least once... but i still do not really like to read books... so oh Lord i decided... for this year... i shall read a book every month! haha! nothing is impossible for You! haha... so Lord, i still need You to help me with this new habit as Lord... im just hungry for more! i want to know more about You and Your word so that Your revelations and visions will be even clearer and i will be able to spread the good word about You and the miracles and Your love to Your people! =)

shall update my blog again! cya peeps soon! =)

2010-01-02T00:58:00.002+08:00

Dear God,

will i be able to play once again as the speed wizard and recover the skills that i have lost during my injury, to refine this talent for You and fulfill Your vision? will i be able to overcome all the pain that i felt in my body everytime i play for You? will i be able to overcome the increasing parental objections or soon-to-be relative's objection when im serving with my best for You?

God... i felt so weak right now... but i know even when the whole world gives up on me, or maybe even when i give up on myself, You will never give up on me and You will always continue to look after me...

Thank you God. =)

2009-12-29T23:15:00.003+08:00

2009 is ending in 3 days time! and soon we are inviting 2010 into our midst! yea! and looking back in 2009... it was a year of spiritual growth for me... and its not just spritual growth, but growth in all aspects in me... like wisdom, capacity etc... and thank God for that! if i did not know You last year, how will i be able to go through what im going through for this year? with You all things are possible!

Dear God, i really thank You for placing dan and cindy teng into my life as my examples! if not for them who always believe in me and help me overcome my weaknesses, especially my temper... i will not be able to rise up as a helper and serving Your kingdom and Your people with so much joy! even though being a helper is not that easy especially with parental objection, but because You believed in me, i have decided to step out in faith and overcome all the obstacles and challenges with You even if its really hard! Thank you Lord for placing me in W319 after my cg's disband, as i learned alot of new things in this cg, being inspired by the youths that were so hungry for Your Word and also thank you Lord for leading to the guy who will run with me to fulfill my vision! and Thank you Lord once again for stretching my capacity and looking after my needs for 2009! if not for You, i would not have been able to overcome my horrendous boss at work and the parental objections (now includes relatives too) at home... and finally Lord, i thank You for letting me meet this special person who i really want to support and help with my best! oh Lord, i got too much things to thank You for... and i will step out in faith and fulfill the dreams that You gave me, and i will continue to serve Your kingdom and people with my best! =)

shall update it soon! cya peeps! =)

2009-12-27T21:53:00.002+08:00

This week was just a great week!! christmas services were just great... with the once in a year christmas drama production which always bring laughter, sorrow and also the truth in the Bible. This year the drama team once again gave a super spirited performance! I was always amazed by the professionalism of the drama team! We also had our end of year service this sat then it was really a great Word! The pure in heart shall see the Lord! We also had our appreciation cgm and our cg chalet together after end of year svc... and to say the truth... im still quite shocked tt i got the servanthood award.. just felt tt serving His peope is the purpose that Lord had placed in my life... =)

2009 will be ending in 5 days time... and 2010 will be coming soon... Im right now in the calm before a great storm... have been seeing some hard challenges ahead of me, especially from my family and relatives... but i know that You are more than enough for me! I believe that with You, everything is possible! i will step out with faith to face this upcoming storm together with You and to receive my breakthrough from You after this storm! =)

shall update the blog soon! so cya soon! =)

2009-12-24T12:49:00.001+08:00

all the outreaches have been so successful!! even though not all the members' classmates came down but we got most of them to come for the outreaches!! and they are quite open for friendship with us! Praise God and i can't wait for xmas service and the drama!! =D

shall update again soon! cya soon! =D

2009-12-21T09:45:00.002+08:00

yesterday's thanksgiving svc was really wonderful! i should say its touching yet exciting... hearing testimonies of people who have went through hard times in their life and yet never give up hope and conitnue to have faith in God really touched me... pst kong and sun are indeed city harvest's heroes and also they are my heroes and my constant inspirations as they really lead by example by showing how they laid their lives down for the Kingdom of God... the svc ended with a big bang and the svc was just unexplainable by words bcoz its just so wonderful..

feeling so convicted after seeing the testimonies and the stories of the unsung heroes in chc... why should i even have complains in my heart about my life now? the heroes went through hardships which is even worse than me and yet they never give up and they continue to love God wholeheartedly... even though 2010 will not be going to be a good year for me... but thanks to the svc ytd and thanks to you for accompanying me to chat ytd... i have my fears removed from me... and no matter how hard it is, i will still serve You with my best and wholeheartedly.. even if my flesh wants to hold me back, i will never fall because i know You are there looking after me and with You i have nothing to fear because with You and Your grace, my problems are so small! =)

thank you Lord for sending me a message ytd, telling me to rise up and impact the youths... and God just like what sun told us ytd... we only have one life, live it to the fullest n pursue the dreams given by God... so Lord i have decided... 3 years for me to prepare myself... and after my diploma i will start pursuing Your dream and vision that You gave me together with the cg member that You led me to, whom also have that same vision as me... =)

will update my blog soon so cya peeps! =)

2009-12-18T09:19:00.003+08:00

yay!! the class outreaches have all started!! and its alwaes so happy to see the friends being open up with friendship and able to talk to us! man... the outreaches that have just passed were all quite fruitful!! Praise God for that!! ytd went to meet up with melvin to buy stuffs for christmas!! chocolates, cards... ( i bought paper to make my own xmas cards!! =D) and we went around to look for candycanes but... causeway point did not sell any even though there are 2 supermarkets and one convenience store!! we even went to visit the pasar malam to see if there were any but there is no candycane but maybe we saw walking canes!! T.T... but its okie! it was considered fruitful!! i shall go visit more supermarkets on saturday morn!! and we saw weijie working at long john silvers at cwp!! next time want offer can go find him!! haha!!

went for a jog as usual but this time rd it was so different... someone was playing at one of the street soccer courts by himself and his playing style is so familiar... and just by looking at him my blood like... starts to boil? but i just cannot remember who is he le... but he seems to remember me and ask me for a 1-1... and hes not tt bad either... managed to fight head on with me and was quite a tough fight and at one moment his special shot caught me at the side of my body and it hurts to the core!! and i remember that shot because its also one of my special shot!! and he also used some of ym playing style and tricks!! i was like playing against my old self and i really keep wondering who is he...

and my dream would have been a good one but yet right now its just a dream that continues to sadden me... the smile that you gave in the dream was so comforting and even in reality too... and it dawns on me that even though i was the one who said to give up for now, but im also the one who did not want to make this decision and maybe im also the only one who missed each other's company and i guess im no longer standing anywhere in you... even though i tried so hard not to think about it... right now i missed the times when we can chat so freely but right now i really wonder... and i alwaes mind about what you are doing... and i admit tt you are really someone who is just so important to me and i... did i do the right decision in saying tt? but i really dun want to give u those unwanted pressure so tt you can reach ur fullest potential and serve Him... but right now im so torn up inside... how i wish we can be like before again.. wonder if you will read this?? =(

will update my blog soon! cya soon! =)

2009-12-15T16:45:00.003+08:00

yesterday's christmas planning was so cool! all the helpers and leaders in the cg were planning about what we are going to do next and the helpers can start all the funnie moves with the word AHHA and the snaps! lol... aren't we creative?? really love this cg to bits... their willingness and hunger for God really inspires me greatly... =)

and right at this moment im reflecting about my own doings since i start coming to church and getting saved by God... I really think that I have did things the wrong way... and it was just so wrong... trying to smoke through people (but of course not my leader) and misleading them with false information... and sharing too much with the wrong people... man i was just so stupid! and right now when i finally start to move back onto the correct track due to God's grace... all these problems start magnifying back at me... people thinking of me like this or like that... even though im unhappy with all these comments and opinions about me but what can i do? i only have myself to blame for doing such stupid things last time... God forgive me for what i did... with Your grace i will pick myself up after this fall and i will learn these mistakes by heart and continue to move on... and God i pray that You will continue to guide me and blessing me with Your wisdom so that i can grow stronger spiritually under Your guidance... =)

shall update soon! =)

2009-12-13T17:44:00.002+08:00

Today is really exciting!! First time i felt so rejuvinated as i have finally completed my therapy for my right leg!! wheee... and it feels good once again to have my "golden right leg" back in action!! haha... running past opponents, using tricks once again, supporting my teammates... it just feels so good! haha! and to melvin: if you read this, i just want to thank God that He led me to you so that im able to find another guy who have the same vision with me! to say the truth, when you are telling what God told you, i was actually super shocked even though my face didn't show it because i had never even told you about this vision of mine and yet God gave you this vision so that we can run together to fulfill His dream!! I really can't wait to sharpen this talent that God gave me tgt with you, braving through all the obstacles and challenges tgt with you and God and finally fulfilling God's vision of impacting the orphans with our soccer mixed with the Word of God... and our soccer is to shine for God and for our own will! =D

man I can't wait to get into the christmas mood! W319's plans for these few weeks are really exciting!! end of year's class outings, candlelight svc, xmas svc, chalet and our appreciation cg!! haha... it might be tiring, but i will still give my best as its all for You my Lord! i will help to set up this platform for You so that You can spread Your unconditional love among the lost souls that we are reaching out to!! and thank God for W319! I felt so excited in this cg as every member is so hungry for you and they are constantly running after Your heart and they really inspires and motivates me!! and God i want to prepare myself for Your will so that You will use me for greater things and i want to rise up so that i can help You to impact youths in my cg and being a strong armorbearer for my cg leaders!! =D

will update my blog soon and cya peeps!! =)

2009-12-12T23:07:00.002+08:00

These 2 days were just so exciting and eventful! on friday we had our cg meeting! even though its a familiar message... but it never fails to inspire me by seeing how God rises up dry bones into humans with body, spirit and soul! once we have faith in God and set up the platform for Him, nothing is impossible with Him even if its rising up dry bones which seems impossible in human views... but He can do it! =) and after that we went to watch Planet 51! Its just simply so funnie! A movie recommended to watch!! =)

Then todae i went for service with W319!! a good message preached by our Pst Kong!! the ways of getting a dream of God and fulfilling it with obedience just like mary, who obeyed to what God says and give birth to our saviour Jesus Christ even though she was under prosecutions!! really inspired by that! and Pst Kong prayed for all the connect group leaders and his anointing is so strong then it basically just "electrocuted" me with his aura and he placed his hand on my head and Colossians 4:6 came out again in my head... "Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one." and imagined how surprised i was when my cg member came over and told me that God reminded him to learn soccer from me and he wants to impact the kids by teaching the kids to play soccer... Gosh!! its just the same as my vision! and i found tt person who can run with me together for my vision!! Praise the Lord!! =)

and so cya soon peeps!! shall update it soon! =D

2009-12-10T23:02:00.002+08:00

phew... this week is finally coming to an end!! a short break from all the boring and tiring work in my wrkplace! and im so looking forward to cgm and svc with W319!! and not forgetting... our cg movie outing after cgm on friday!! so looking forward to seeing them once again and hving fun fellowships with them!! =)

as for now... im currently visiting a physio right now to let him check on my body and to "modify" my body... haha! as i have to prepare this body of mine for all the upcoming soccer visitations and competitions and also God's vision for me... so the report came out and it shows that i have overstressed my 2 knees and especially at the lower shin area (just slightly above the ankle) on the right leg and he said that it might cause stress fracture and so he send me to do some therapy on my right leg and it feels alot better... like foot spa!! hahaha!! and hes currently helping me with my body balance especially on my legs as i tends to use more of my right leg then my left leg so im currently training on my body balance and once again prepare myself to take on the first step of the journey to fulfill His vision!! thank you God for Your presence and strength which brings me through all these "refinings" of my talent given by You! =)

this week's prayer meeting and zone prayer meeting were really good but sadly i can only go for 30mins for the morning pms which is really sad for me.... but its okie! at least i went n felt His presence!! haha... and i feel the power of prayer for growth and i believe that growth is coming our way for the church and also our cg and its time we prepare ourselves before it became another divine delay!! and i want to be a strong armorbearer for my cg leaders and run together with them and flow with the cg and church's vision!! and God i need your wisdom and strength... as it is impossible by man alone but its possible with God!! =)

and so i shall update it very soon!! see you peeps! =D

2009-12-09T16:26:00.002+08:00

haha... its almost time to finish work soon!! woohoo... cant wait for prayer meeting!! its gonna be cool! but man... work here is getting more tiring and more boring and i guess its nt due to physical tireness but more of mental tireness.... =X But then its just true... my boss is giving me alot of problems at work, either preparing posion arrows to shoot me in the head or trying to play my mind off?? But im trying to read her mind and see what is going on in her mind and whats she thinking... LOL! But God... will you tell me what is going on here?? my friends are being accused by my boss just bcoz they are sharing a table with me to work and she can accuse either they are distracting me or i cannot do my work because of them... haiz... at one moment i really do think that why am i still working here... and it will be alot better if i left my workplace so that my boss would not drag anyone else into more trouble..

But God, i know You are seeing my situation now... and to You its just nothing to you and so God i really pray that you will show me the purpose of me working in this place and also what i should do next... and thank you Lord that you have stretched my capacity and endurance to another level if not i think i might be going crazy with anger by now?? @.@...

shall update my blog again soon! =)

2009-12-07T23:39:00.002+08:00

oh God... guide me and tell me if im going in the correct way... i start to miss her more often... even though we don't talk much face to face and we only communicate through sms and phone calls, it really matters alot to me... there are really a lot of reasons why i did not talk to you much when we saw each other face to face and i really hope that you will forgive me and understand me for that... it was so long since i felt like this, really liking someone with my heart... and i must respect your decision and i guess im really satisfied just seeing you for now and i promise i will try my best to talk to you as much as possible when i got the chance... and i will be the one who will stand near you and give you my full support for you and wait for you when you need me... =)

and im off for my own training now... =)

2009-12-07T13:46:00.002+08:00

this few weeks have been a rocky path for me especially in my work. Days when i was backstabbed for dunno how many times, days when i got accused by my boss for not doing work when everytime im putting my all for the work and really... thank you Lord for stretching my capacity, my tolerance and my endurance to another level and without You i don't think i can manage to survive for that long under such an "ultimate level" boss. Sometimes i really imagine if i had not known You and saved by Your grace and mercy, what will i become as of now? *shudders* i cant imagine how violent i can be... >.<

and God thank you for Your encouraging word during the night when i heard of all these nonsense that made me so down, and thank you Lord for that refreshing touch that can let me last through the whole night training which i intended to go and sweat it out and throw away my feelings, even without a night of sleep, i still can go for soccer with my cg guys... and not only that You gave me a fruitful training that night so that i improve abit on my body balance and i can start dribbling the ball with my left leg... thank you Lord... i really dunno how much i can thank You for all these while which You have blessed me with Your strength... =)

just wanna say something... talent is not something that is given to us when we are born... but through tons and tons of "refining", this piece of unrefined gem will be refined and and will shine for the Lord our God for His glory we shall use this talent that we have just refined to the best!! and tts all peeps... shall update soon! =)

2009-11-30T22:54:00.007+08:00

back to update the blog once against!! these few weeks were really "eventful"... some good and some bad... but of course i am not going to remember all the bad stuffs! haha!! *throw them to God* =P

so right now im part of W319!! and i can blend in with them so easily is due to their warmness... thank you W319 for celebrating my birthday... was really touched and really love you all lots! hope to spend a happy and fruitful time with W319 and running together with them for their vision for God!! =D

and so thats all folks... shall write again... see you! =D

2009-11-18T09:21:00.003+08:00

haha!! shimin said that my blog is going to die le so i shall come back to save this blog! *wears the superman suit and gives a flying pose?* wahahaha!!

W495 have went through alot of situations this few weeks. One of it was the incident of putting negative comments on the blog. I really think that blogging can be really dangerous if you use it for the wrong cause as blogs are open to the public and everyone can see it so whatever you write inside, people from everywhere can see, even some tom, dick or harry from dunno which country! So the best way is to find the person you disagree with and discuss with him/her and settle it peacefully rather than writing negative comments in blogs and then posting it. God, we really need you to help us conquer our own weakness. With you, nothing is impossible! =D

2009-07-21T12:32:00.003+08:00

weee.... im back once again... haha... din post anything new for the whole wkend... so let me recap and update what i did on the wkends plus ytd... haha!! hmmm.... so lets see... friday was at work as usual then went to dexter's house for cell group. I realised that i was stoning through the animal game... haha!! slow reaction... >.<

went to church to attend svc on sat!! pastor kong is back... wheee.... and his msg about the Holy Spirit and the spiritual atmosphere was really good!! provoked my spirit to conitnue leading team streetlights to another level... =D and the whole cg went to watch Harry Potter!! haha... the movie wasnt tt bad just tt the chair is really small... and cindy kwoh scare me by screaming in shock over some creatures suddenly appearing out... hehe.... >.<

leading the basketball training for team streetlights on sunday... was testing them how well they can endure when they are tired (in other words, stamina). It turned out not tt bad as the whole team can click together now and they are all giving their best... was really encouraged by that... really hope that team streetlights will grow to another level when we play our maiden match, most probably on this coming sun... =D

shall see you all again!! XD

2009-07-15T13:07:00.002+08:00

this morning was really hectic... have to prepare 3 groups of keys once i reach the office for the conferences that will be held at PGP residences for the next few days and its about 200plus keys in total... @.@... and that took me almost a whole morning le... haha... but nevertheless time passes fast and it will be time for bible class!! woohoo!! learning the Word of God! =D

and oh God, i pray that you will guide me through what You told me ytd nite while passing me the shiny basketball when i was walking home... Guide me through if Im supposed to stir up a new wave in Your kingdom, and bless me with your wisdom so that I can manage my finances even more efficiently if not I have to quarrel with my mum over the money again(zzz...). =D

can't wait for time to pass and being able to go for bible class!! XD

shall see you all again!! XD

2009-07-14T11:16:00.010+08:00

todae is boring at work as thrs nt much students checking in (and im having my dark chocolate!! =P)... but its like the calm before a storm as the main crowd have not checked in yet!! >.<... went to do clean room inspection just now and i went into an occupied room! and the worst part was the girl just finished shower and walked out of the toilet with a towel!! I immediately apologised and ran out of the room with just 2 seconds!! >.<

and i think im old and starts to have STM (short term memory) le as i keep forgetting things!! haha!! I need to go in and out of the house 2 times before i go for basketball bcoz forget to take my bread and then my socks... and i forget to bring my thumbdrive to work todae!! wahaha!! >.<

and its time i shall continue to have trust in God and continue to step out in faith into my unknown future as im sure with God, i will be able to step over my obstacles and challenges that im facing now and im sure my failing body condition will not trip me down with the grace of God!

shall see you all again!! XD

2009-07-13T22:02:00.003+08:00

oh draw me oh draw me away....
Messiah today in your presence to stay....
oh Jesus now save me and mould me....
that i can be evermore true to Thee.

2009-07-13T16:05:00.008+08:00

wahahaha!! finally my blog is up after a few failed attempts bcoz of my laziness... =P

my body isn't in a good condition and its against all odds... but i still believe that God will come and heal me since theres nth much medicine can do to my body.. oh God come and heal me so i can continue to do my best for the dream that You gave me. =D

todae's office is like a battleground!! bcoz of student's mass check in, so we have to prepare the keys as fast as possible.. but managed to settle it without having to do ot todae, and tts why can update blog in office too... hehe!! XD

and it was so happy for me to be able to see her!! but its abit too sudden? so my face was like charcoal burning and ready for bbq... wahahaha!! even though really paiseh, but my heart to yearning to see her more... >.<

shall see you all again!! XD